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Stupid tourist questions 

"'Shall I take the saddle off so my horse can drink? Do you take the horses' shoes off at night? Do you put that pack on the horse so if he falls he won't hurt hisself?'" mimicked the dude wrangler. "One woman says to me last season when I had her in [Yellowstone] Park: 'Mr. Turkey-track,' in a falsetto voice, 'do these hot pools freeze over in winter?' 'Yes ma'am,' I says, 'a cook broke through the ice an' scalded his foot so bad they had to take him to the hospital.'"

-Caroline Lockhart, Old West and New (1933), p. 289

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